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An Update on Our Snowbird Status

October 29, 2018 By Sara M. 4 Comments

 

Snowbirds

Thanks to all of the readers of my popular piece, Why I Became a Snowbird in my 30’s.

I responded to many of the comments, but I wanted to provide a formal update.

Unfortunately, we have had to give up snowbirding. Over the years we faced many barriers to our trips, but the biggest hurdle is the kids’ schooling.

Inflexible School Systems

During our last trip, we had to finagle a partial trip for our middle schooler, my stepdaughter, because she was only able to take 3 weeks off of school. We thought we were in pretty good shape because it was pre-approved with the school and we were told she’d be given work to do while we were away. We arranged to have her grandparents take care of her because her mother does not live locally.

When it came time to take the trip, the teachers did not have work prepared, and instead told our daughter to enjoy her vacation. Despite the pre-approval and offer to work on vacation, the teachers appeared to penalize her for the remainder of the year, even after she caught up with the rest of the class. We were extremely unhappy with this outcome and registered this worry for future trips.

Now that she is in high school, and if it were just her, we *can* resume our Florida trips because her high school offers online school. She can actually take the first semester in person, which ends around Christmas, and then participate in online school for the rest of the year. All of the high schools in our area offer this option.

Unfortunately, this is our younger daughter’s first year in elementary school. At the orientation we inquired about the possibility of a long trip to Florida in the winter. The administrator looked surprised that we’d even asked something like this; he said the only way we could do it would be to disenroll her from their school, enroll her in Florida, and then reenroll her in Pennsylvania when we returned. And honestly, it sounded too disruptive to go through all those hoops.

Just as I was preparing to write this, I did hear of another family from my area (not the same primary school, though) that actually does this. My immediate concern was how the kids adapted to that much change every year. And to my surprise, they love it. The kids have friends in both locations, and it’s been so regular that no-one even bats an eye at it now. But, I still hesitate because I don’t know if it would be good for my kids. Even during our prior trips at their very young ages, I noticed a considerable transition period both when we’d arrive and when we’d return home.

So, as you can see, the biggest problem for us is schooling. There are also a couple of housing factors that would also complicate things if we decided to do it anyways:

1) The area that we were renting in has gotten more and more expensive every year

2) We do not always rent the same house so the kids could potentially have to go to different schools. And while it would be preferable to buy a property, the higher prices would probably deter us from doing that.

3) Lack of familial support. If you’ve been reading, you know that we don’t have much in the way of family support systems. Instead, we have had to work really hard to build up our child care support networks. To confound matters, when we leave for extended periods of time, we risk our home support network while simultaneously having to build a new temporary one in Florida.

Our New Plan

I’m sorry I cannot report more success in this area because I know a number of you are considering snowbirding with kids. This past winter was really hard for my family, especially my husband. We couldn’t even take a short trip this year because we had a newborn and quite frankly, there are so many of us now. At six people, we now need two hotel rooms to be comfortable. So, around February, my husband wilted despite a couple of his business trips being in sunny locales.

As the cold season approaches again, the topic of how we are going to deal with future winters has become urgent again. One idea is to plan a pick-me-up vacation of at least 10 days in late January/early February. It has to be a sunny location, and we will stretch for even longer even if that means we send the teen home early. Because there are so many of us, we’ll be looking for an Airbnb type place so we can stay centralized in one place and cook for ourselves to offset the cost.

Secondarily, we are going to start trying some active winter trips. Living in the northeast we are within driving distance from many ski resorts so we are going to take some weekend trips to keep up our activity level despite the cold.

And lastly, we’ve all begun to take a supplemental Vitamin D. I learned that we simply do not get enough vitamin D from the sun in our area so a daily supplement can help boost energy levels. I’ve also purchased my husband a sun lamp that he can use in his office to increase his intake of vitamin D.

I’ll let you know how each of these things turn out. I wish there were easier ways to manage schooling for those of us that prefer to snowbird for our health. I can only hope that school systems will become more flexible in the future, and I am looking forward to the later years when our highschoolers will have more flexibility.

 

One Last Note on Homeschooling

The next obvious question is… if school is the problem, why don’t we homeschool our children?

And the truth of the matter is that we (I mean “I”) could. But, after spending the last six years with my children, I have come to the conclusion that our children would do better in a traditional school setting. I think this is a result of the blend of personalities (including my own) and the ages of each member. Plus, having the children in the home day in and day out makes it difficult for my husband to concentrate on his business. I am open to homeschooling the children as they mature and progress in their education if I am able to test that our learning relationship improves.

 

I wish I had better news for those of you interested in forging your own path for your family instead the the typical one. I’d love to hear success stories in the comments if you have found a way to make this work for you!

 

 

Filed Under: Parenting, Wellbeing Tagged With: balance, dreams, family, goals, kids, sanity plan

Sanity Plan Success Stories – Embracing Your Dream Career

March 21, 2017 By Sara M. 11 Comments

Today’s success story comes from a friend with a very similar journey to my own. What I love the most about her story is that it demonstrates that everyone will have a different Sanity Plan, but the end result will be the same:

a sane & manageable life. 

Joelene Wolfe is a mom, wife, marketer, and the creator of Happiness Depends. After many years of following someone else’s dream, she took the big leap to finally follow her dream of acting. And now she is helping others take the 1st step toward their dream career on HappinessDepends.com. 

We’re all a little kooky at times and that’s totally acceptable.  Life would be boring if we weren’t.  However being totally insane and unhappy… now that’s not my cup of tea.  You see, at one point in my life I was miserable.  I was trying to convince myself and everyone around me that I was happy.  Let me tell you, that was exhausting and it nearly drove me to insanity.

I spent my entire career working in the corporate world.  Somewhere deep down inside, though, I knew that it wasn’t what I wanted to do but I was afraid after so many years to make a change.  I mean, that’s usually what holds us back – fear.  Right?

I would come home from work and tell my husband that I was dying a little everyday walking into that office.

Even still, I tried to convince myself otherwise.  My typical day was filled with feeling anxious, unappreciated, and literally like a fish out of water.  There were days that I literally couldn’t breathe. I was not in my element at all.

Here’s the thing… I wasn’t young anymore.  I had an established career that I worked at for years and who the heck would take my dream seriously anyway?   I left that important little detail out.  Didn’t I?  So my dream since the wee age of three was to become an actor.  Yup, you read that correctly.   I also forgot to mention that I was just over forty years old.  I guess if we are to dream, we might as well dream big.

I knew that things at my company weren’t going well and a few of us were ultimately laid off.  Most people would have buried their heads in the sand but not me.  Nope.  To the contrary, I heard angelic music playing in my head.  I was ready.


So, I decided to put an exit strategy in place – my own personal sanity plan.

It was kind of like one of those action films when there seems to be no hope.  Then in the nick of time, the main character goes against all the odds and finds a way out of the situation.  Well my story was exactly like that, minus the special effects and camera man, but you get the gist.

Insanity no more!  No more being tied to a desk doing something I didn’t love for people who didn’t love me.  I seized the moment after many years of procrastinating and shushing my dream. I did not overthink it. I just decided to take that first step.

My 9 step sanity plan was simple really and you can do it too.

  1. Move forward and never look back – the past is the past
  2. Only share your plan with your closest people – avoid naysayers
  3. Force yourself to take an action everyday toward your goal – little steps equal big successes
  4. Read every positive thinking or inspirational book you can get your hands on – what a difference these make
  5. Just go with your flow – that feeling inside that can’t be explained but always knows if you are on the right course
  6. Celebrate the small victories and don’t get hung up on the losses – you are worth it
  7. Learn to relish every moment doing what you love – living in the now is huge
  8. Be truly grateful for everything – both the things you have and things that you want
  9. Envision yourself as the person you plan to be – in all your glory

It really works. Through this process I finally realized that I wasn’t here to live out someone else’s dream.  My sanity plan was solely to live out mine.

So I am thrilled to report that I have been acting for over four years. I have been in many commercials, TV shows, films, videos, ads and many other wonderfully crazy gigs. The great kind of crazy!  I have met so many amazing people and at the end of the day I am proud of myself.  That first baby step led to a life I never thought possible.  In fact, if you would have told me 5 years ago that this is where I would be, I would have thought YOU were the insane one. Yet here I am.

So my advice to you is this – if you are in a career that is not in alignment with your heart, don’t get overwhelmed with all the details of how to get there.  Just decide on your sanity plan and take one small step every day.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life and don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. Most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.”  —Steve Jobs

Take that step. Live your dream. Be happy.

 

I love hearing inspirational stories about how people find what really works for them.

Do you have a Sanity Plan success story to share? Let me know in the comments or contact me here. 

Filed Under: Success Stories Tagged With: career, dreams, passion, work

The Sanity Plan Success Stories – A Flexible Freelance Career

January 24, 2017 By Sara M. 19 Comments

I met the owner of our next success story online. I was inspired by her commitment towards developing the career she wanted, even if that meant trying out many things until she found what worked. Here is Carrie’s Sanity Plan:

 

My name is Carrie, and I’m a registered nurse turned freelance writer. Last year I launched the Healthy Work at Home Mom to share what I’ve learned about creating a thriving business from home without burning yourself out.

I’ve wanted to work from home since the moment I became a mom four years ago. I remember sitting in our little apartment during maternity leave and deciding to check my work email. Our new baby was sleeping next to me as I logged in. I had just had her, but when I checked my email, I noticed one that said, “only 2 weeks until Carrie gets back!” I just sat there staring at my computer trying to process that. I had just had a baby! I quickly pulled up a calendar and realized I had indeed already been home with her for 10 weeks. Well, you know what happens next. I immediately burst into tears and decided to make a change.

I started researching ways that nurses can work from home and landed on medical writing. I began pitching myself to every company I could find, started a blog, and eventually landed a few freelance jobs. I slowly began cutting back my hours at the hospital and worked my last shift as a nurse at the end of 2016.

Being able to work from home for myself and be with my kids was absolutely the best decision I’ve ever made, but it still comes with its challenges. If I wake up one morning and the baby is sick, I no longer have to scramble to figure out daycare and who’s turn it is to call in and how I’m going to get in to the doctor. However, I do have to figure out when on earth I’m going to get my client work done.

Here are some of the strategies that have helped me the most:

  • Time blocking – I now have a weekly schedule with chunks of time for all of my projects. This has saved me so much time. Each time I have work time (during kindergarten and nap time), I know exactly what I need to do, so I don’t waste time feeling overwhelmed. On Mondays I edit and write outlines. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays are for billable client work. On Wednesdays, I work on my blog and shoot a Facebook live video.
  • Embracing my season – It’s really easy for me to look at what others have accomplished and feel discouraged. I have big dreams and just want to get there. But I always come back to the fact that the reason I started freelancing was to be home with my kids, and that’s where I am. They won’t always be this little and need this much help, so I’m embracing my season. I have plenty of time to build my empire 🙂
  • Believing in myself – I think when you are working on a big goal (like leaving your 9-5 to work for yourself), it’s easy to doubt yourself. I certainly did. While my husband and family always believed in me, no one else understood what I was trying to build. No one thought this was possible. That’s where I had to decide that I was going to do this, even if I didn’t know exactly how. Every time I took a step forward, the next right step found me.

I love to see how other people create their Sanity Plans and put them into action. Creating a job that provides the flexibility to combine two dreams at once (motherhood and business ownership) is quite an achievement. Inspired? Read more on how to build your own Sanity Plan here.

Do you have a Sanity Plan success story to share? Let me know in the comments or reach out to me through my contact page. 

Filed Under: Parenting, Success Stories, Work/Life Tagged With: basics, business ownership, dreams, entrepreneur, family, goals, motherhood, parenting, productivity, sanity plan

The Sanity Plan Success Stories – A Salon for One

January 4, 2017 By Sara M. 16 Comments

As I continue to work on my Sanity Plan, I am noticing people all around me with Sanity Plans of their own. I am always keeping a look out for how people take steps (big or small) to accomplish a goal or even change the direction of their whole life.

Today’s story is about my wonderful hair dresser. I’ve known Teri for about 4 years and have had a front row seat to watch how she was able to manifest a significant change in her life. I know it will inspire you as well.

I first met Teri in a fancy salon in our downtown historic section. The setting was gorgeous and I always felt like a pampered queen when I went there. I didn’t mind the extra expense because I typically only go once or twice a year (read: lazy mom-do). I’d been passed around to a number of ladies until Teri cut my hair, and it looked great and stayed great for months. I also looked forward to our conversations about life, kids, marriage, writing, and business. The business talks were my favorite subject as I have my MBA and she was working on her BA in Business at the time.

Teri’s Sanity Plan

Teri had more than 20 years of experience in hair care, with a considerable list of devoted clients. She was growing tired of the politics at the salon and was concerned that her customers were not getting the best experience. Teri made a decision to venture off on her own.

She rented a tiny shop less than a mile away and set up a single chair and washing station. She and her husband updated and decorated the space to capture that modern salon feel. Teri worked to set up her business, learning each step that was required along the way.

The Results

I was a little apprehensive for my first visit because I’d really enjoyed the ambiance of the previous salon. But the experience was actually so much better for me, without the chaos and the noise, and we easily continued our ongoing conversation. It was private and cozy, offering a very different feel than I was used to.

The best part of this change, which took an enormous amount of courage, is that I have never seen a more happy and relaxed business owner. It’s been the better part of a year and I can see the true joy and relief she experiences in being her own boss and having full control over her career.

Her favorite parts?

  • Setting her own schedule
  • Having a private space to serve her clients and be creative
  • Getting time to talk one-on-one with her customers
  • Keeping more of the profits from her work
  • Being able to work alone if she chooses
  • Learning all aspects of business ownership and salon operation

What is so inspiring to me about Teri’s change is her devotion to the process. She made a decision, set her plans in motion, and followed through. There was no waffling, no back and forth, or letting her fears of the unknown stop her from achieving this dream. She negotiated a peaceful transition of her personal clients from the old salon (most of whom she had brought there). And she is conscious of tackling each new process with measured precision, allowing for time to learn new skills before beginning a new project.

Thanks for the inspiration, Teri. Keep up the good work!

Do you have a Sanity Plan Story? Contact me to set up an interview or recommend the story of someone you know.

 

Filed Under: Success Stories Tagged With: balance, dreams, entrepreneur, flexibility, goals, mom boss, sanity plan, success

What Does Sanity Mean to You?

September 26, 2016 By Sara M. 3 Comments

pinterest-yogaAccording to Merriam-Webster, the simple definition of Sanity is:

: the condition of having a healthy mind

: the condition of being based on reason or good judgment

Since our mission is Sanity, our first step on the journey is to define what it means to us. Everyone will have a slightly different definition based on their own needs and experiences. For example, what makes one person feel calm might make another person feel anxious.

Here is what Sanity looks like to me:

Calm and peaceful

Calmness and quiet moments are nourishing for me. My favorite activities are often solo, with minimal distractions. I love to find a quiet corner to read or write. I look forward to driving alone in the car, with the radio off, to have uninterrupted time to think. With the chaos of having young kids and a busy household, it is critical for me to have alone time, quiet time, and down time. It is this time that allows me to recharge and better navigate the more stressful demands of parenting and life.

Smooth and systematic

Functional plans and systems keep me sane. Doesn’t it feel great when things go according to plan? Those are the days when I feel like the stars just line up. When the kids take a nap at the same time and I am able to get work done without anyone hanging on me or interrupting me every 3 minutes. Regular and recurring tasks must be automated wherever possible to ease the workload.

Close and connected

Strong relationships are incredibly important to me. My husband is my best friend, and I don’t feel right when we are at odds. I am working on developing friendships with people who also have young kids because I need that camaraderie. I also keep up with my own family regularly, they provide an additional layer of emotional support.

680x450-reading2Balanced

This one is a hard one. Finding and maintaining the right balance. Many of our obligations cannot be changed, so it is hard to make time for everything that needs to be done. I must balance between my family’s needs and my own. I must balance between work for others and time spent on my own creative ventures. I must balance work and play.

Having high level goals helps prioritize time allocated to each area of my life.

Grounded

I feel my best when I am present. I often have to remind myself where my feet are, to feel the ground beneath them. Putting my life and my responsibilities into a greater perspective keeps my thoughts sensible and rational.

It will be important to define what Sanity looks like for you as we go through the process of building a Sanity Plan. Take time to reflect on when you feel your best. Consider the times in your life when your mind is most clear. Describe the activities that make you feel the most refreshed, recharged, and ready to fight your daily battles.

This visualization will become the guiding compass for the goals we set in our Sanity Plan.

Remember, Sanity is defined as a condition, a state of being. Not a few fleeting moments here and there.

Join this series to learn how to build your Sanity Plan:

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Filed Under: Wellbeing Tagged With: dreams, sanity, sanity plan

The Power of Saying Thank You To My Husband

August 28, 2016 By Sara M. Leave a Comment

680x450-couple-holding-hands

Today I told my husband, “Thank you for making my dreams come true.”

And it’s true, because he has given me the opportunity to finally follow my dream of becoming a writer and a creative. He has supported every decision I’ve made to not return to traditional work. He has let me explore every entrepreneurial opportunity without ever demanding my financial contribution. This was the freedom and support I needed in order to allow this fundamental part of me to bloom.

To tell you the truth, it was hard to say. I felt uncomfortable getting the words out and I realize that I am out of practice with talking with my husband in this way. We used to share matters of the heart so much more often before kids.

And the result? He felt validated. He was happy to know that his hard work and daily grind makes a difference for me. That his efforts serve a purpose, and help to make me a happier, better person. Because most of the time, all he ever wants to do is please his lady.

Sanity Plan Lesson: Marriage is a partnership that thrives on open emotional communication. Make a conscious effort to see the things that your partner does for you and express gratitude or praise for them.

Filed Under: Relationships, Wellbeing Tagged With: communication, dreams, love, marriage, thank you

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Welcome to THE SANITY PLAN! Here you will find my attempts to restore order in my crazy life post kids. I'm just getting started & I have a lot to say. So far I've written a lot about my perspectives on parenting (sorry, it's where I am at), but I'd love it if you followed my journey to improve my habits, get more organized, redefine my career, and generally live a good life. Or, you can follow just for the entertainment, I promise there will be lots of that. Do you want to learn more about building A Sanity Plan?

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